Bye My Baby
by turp3nt1n3xk1ss3s
Summary: Lily has become pregnant in her fifth year of school with James’ baby. She has come to a decision to give her away, but will she be able to with the help of James?
1. Selfish

**Bye My Baby**

**By: PorcelainxDoll**

**Summary: Lily has become pregnant in her fifth year of school with James' baby. She has come to a decision to give her away, but will she be able to with the help of James?**

**Rated: T For Teen Pregnancy and Language.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing, but Yumi and Kalika. Kalika is Lily's baby so I named her something that meant Rosebud. And Yumi is her best friend and her name means Lily. And also, the plot I didn't copy from anyone, this is based on my life. I was put up for adoption and the letter at the beginning actually has excerpts from the letter that I have from my mother.**

_Dear Kalika,_

_I'm so sorry for leaving you like I did and I hope one day you will find me and forgive me. I am your mother and I was just a child when I had you. I didn't know what else to do when I found out that I was with child. I wanted you to have the best life you could have and I knew that couldn't have happened if I had kept you. I needed to continue my education at my school and my parents died a year ago so I now live with my friend who's parent's could not have taken care of you. I'm writing you this when you're just two months old and I have just made my decision hoping it is for the best._

_I am giving you to a magical family because myself and your father are a witch and a wizard. If you ask your parents they will explain to you better and on your eleventh birthday you will most likely get an invitation to come to the school that I am currently attending. _

_I want you to know that I do love you with all my heart and this is the hardest decision that I have ever made and it take a while for me to make it. Your father is also taking this very hard and he also is going to write you a letter, but not at this moment because he said he isn't ready. I understand he can't even get over what has happened since we are at such a young age. _

_Kalika, I will you write to you until you tell me to stop, my baby. You will always be mine, but always respect the parents that you are being given to. I know they will love you with all they have. _

_Love,_

_ Your Mother, Lily _

"Would you like to see what I wrote to Kalika?" asked a girl with long dark red hair with hollow emerald green eyes. She was standing above a boy with messy black hair and deep hazel eyes that were looking up at her.

"Of course. You know I want to write to her also, right? She's going to be beautiful," said the boy with messy black hair. The two parents had gotten a test earlier in the week to see what gender the baby would be since you could now tell with magic.

"Yes, I told her that in the letter and who knows? You might be able to write to her before she comes out and she won't be able to read for a while anyway so it's okay James, I know it hurts."

The girl now looked like she was about to tear up at the mentioning of the words that it would hurt so she said down on the comfortable red leather couch in the Gryffindor common room. James as he was now addressed stood and moved to where his girlfriend of two months and one week sat holding her close to him.

"Lily, it will be alright. Kalika will be okay with her new parents and she'll have a wonderful life even if we won't be with her."

Lily now known as looked at James deep into his eyes and started crying again for the second time since the first was when she had started writing the letter to her unborn child. She couldn't understand how this could have happened to her.

"James, I'm only fifteen and I still will be when I have the baby. It's September now and everyone is going to see me get pregnant. I'm a prefect! How is that supposed to look?" She now looked worried, upset, and just angry at the world for many different reasons. She wanted to keep her baby more than anything, but she couldn't stay at home with her because she didn't have enough money for her own place and her parents had been killed by Voldemort so he her friend's parent's that she lived with would not allow her to keep it.

"I know you're worried about what everyone will think, but at least you're not doing something stupid like abortion. At least you have the Gryffindor courage to actually _have_ the baby at fifteen and then let it have the good life it _should _have. People should respect you for that and if they don't then they have problems of your own. It'll be okay. You won't be showing for another couple of months and be then it will be Christmas break."

Lily once again glanced over at her boyfriend lovingly and understood why she loved him so much. He could make her feel better with every situation that was at hand. He would have made a great father if they could have the chance.

"I'm not giving it up." She now looked very determined and the worried look was wiped off her beautiful face.

"You have to, darling. Please, don't make it harder on yourself than it already is."

"No. It's my baby, James, and we can make this happen. You have a little bit of money, I have a little bit of money. Why can't we just combine that and get the smallest thing we can find? We can even move to a different city if everything in Surrey is too expensive."

"Stop it, Lily. Do you hear what you're saying? We barely have any money that is our own and I'm sorry, but my parents aren't too happy about this and I know that Yuri's parents won't give you money for this type of thing. You're being extremely selfish. Think of the baby. Do you want her to have that kind of life?"

If you looked at James' face now and didn't know him you might think he was mad, but Lily could tell he was just putting passion into what he was saying, and he was right. She was being selfish, but wasn't it okay in this kind of thing? It was her baby and she wasn't her.

"I just want her."

That was her last sentence before she left to go up to her fifth year's dorm to talk to her best friend, Yuri. James continued sitting there contemplating what Lily had been saying when his own best friend, Sirius Black, decided to sit beside him on the couch where Lily was at moments before since James had scooted away.

"Hey Prongs, how have you been doing?" asked Sirius who had long black hair like James, but it was neatly combed into a low ponytail at the nape of his neck. He also had the exact shape of eyes like James, but instead of the warm hazel his held an astounding grey color to them.

"Not too good since Lily is trying to keep our baby," said James. Sirius, Yuri, and the nurse were the only people other than the parents that knew about Lily being pregnant and James was very thankful that he had someone to talk to other than Lily about this whole situation especially at times like these.

"So are you going to?"

"I want to, Sirius, I really do, but I can't. You know I don't barely any money to my own name and neither does Lily since her parents died. It would be selfish of us to give our child that we loved that kind of life."

Sirius nodded his head in agreement to what James said not really knowing what to say since he hadn't been in the situation even though he was known to have a few girlfriends. He wasn't one to go sleep with them though since he had just recently lost his virginity at fifteen.

"Well, I understand where you're coming from with that idea, but I also understand where Lily is coming from since it's her baby. And yes, I know it's your baby too and you want what's best for it also, but you know with her hormones right now who knows what's going on in her head."

"I guess, Padfoot. I just hope she realizes what she'll be doing if she does that. I will of course help her and support her in each and every decision she makes, I'll just disagree heavily in my little head of mine."

"She'll make the right decision for the baby, Prongs. Don't worry, she's Lily."

Nodding like Sirius had done before they got up from the familiarness of the couch and headed on their way to the Great Hall for dinner seeing people head that way from other years.


	2. Thrown Out

**Chapter Two: Thrown Out**

The next morning Lily came down with tears running down her face and her hand on her still flat stomach. Seeing James on their favorite red leather couch she moved to where he was and sat down beside him cuddling up to sit as close as she could come.

"What's the matter, baby?" asked James looking at the tears on his girlfriend's face. He kissed a few away before settling back to look at Lily.

"Yuri. Her parents kicked me out of her home and she is forbidden to see me because of my baby. Why are they doing is this to me?" Lily was screaming out her pain towards James and he looked surprised at the new information.

"I'm so sorry, Lily. They just can't understand that some people aren't perfect even though I don't think what we did was wrong. I wish I could say that my parents would allow you to stay with me, but I've already asked them once I heard the news and they refused. Do you have anywhere else to go?" asked James more worried about Lily than anything at the moment.

"You know my other friend that I sometimes hang out, Cierdesa Bradford? Don't tell anyone this because I don't think anyone has ever known, but she had a miscarriage when she was fourteen years old. Her parents really accepted her when she was pregnant and they said they wouldn't mind if I lived with them even if I had the baby."

_Oh no, now she can keep the baby_, was the only thought that was running through James' mind at the moment when Lily told him the news. Of course he was happy that she had a place to stay, but he knew the reputation that Cierdesa had as the 'bad ass chick' of Hogwarts and he didn't really like it when Lily hung out with her.

Pushing his feeling asides at the moment he put a smile on his face and replied, "that's great, hon. Is she coming with us to breakfast?"

As he said this he knew he didn't need to go further because he saw the girl that was the talk of all the worst rumors to go through Hogwart's history come down the stairs at that moment with a frown on her face. She had a very small figure he noticed since her shirt came down to where her midriff showed he could also tell that you could see most of her ribs. Grimacing slightly to himself, he watched as her black hair with hot pink, purple, and white highlights swayed in her ponytail while her alarming pale blue eyes stood out.

"Hi, I'm Cierdesa, I'm sure we've met before," she said walking up towards the couple who were now standing beside the couch.

"Yeah of course, I'm James. I'm sure we'll be seeing each other a lot more since you'll now be around Lily a lot more." He stretched forth his hands toward her and alarmingly, to him anyway, she just raised an eyebrow before shaking it and giving him an obvious faking smile.

"Well, I'll leave the cute couple alone now, shall I?" Once she said this she left leaving the males in the room to stare at her go since her skirt was cut off right after it reached past her bottom.

Glancing at her James shot her a look and then glanced back at the now smiling Lily, "well isn't she the ever polite one?"

"I know she isn't that nice and everything, but I don't care. She's really cool I think. She doesn't care what people think about her and that's the kind of friend I need right now. I'm going to go catch up with her and I hope you do too once Sirius catches up with you, okay?" Giving him a kiss goodbye she left him to wonder about her sudden mood-swing.

Sitting back down on the couch and making himself comfortable he was upset when only a short time later he was upset by a sudden distraction at the top of the boys' staircase. Looking up he saw that of course it would happen to be the person he was waiting for tumbling down once he tripped on a shoelace.

Dusting himself off he spoke in his deep voice towards friend, "Why hello Prongs, where is Lily this fine lovely morning?"

"Oh she's with her new friend Cierdesa. Do you know her?"

"Yeah. We dated each other in fourth year. She's a real good fuck too so you know if you ever break up with Lily and need rebound sex you could always go for her," replied Sirius looking slyly at James who looked disgusted.

"No thanks though she does look like your time so I should have known."

"Oh? I have a type?"

'Yes you do, Padfoot. Now be quiet, we're at the Great Hall and we're about to see them."

"Aw yes, hello Cierdesa, Lily, my beautiful ladies. Can I assist you at all this morning in any way possible?"

Lily laughed at Sirius' antics that she was now used to by now, but Cierdesa winked at him and suggested at him to 'meet with her at her bedroom later'.

"You want to come with me to our next class?" said Sirius winking at Cierdesa making Lily laugh at the two as James rolled his eyes.

Noticing something as they walked off together James turned towards Lily who he laughed at since she was once again on her hungry rampages. She was eating pancakes, eggs, sausages, and bacon not bothering to stop when he started asking her a question.

"Why does that girl have pointy ears?"

"Hm, I never really noticed I guess. I don't think I should just go up to her and ask her about it though. I mean, I doubt it to be very nice," said Lily still munching on her breakfast.

Shrugging his shoulders and placing his plate towards the middle of the table making the food disappear he waited for his lovely 'angel' to finish her meal. Once she was done they got up and headed to their first and most hated class, Potions. Sliding into her usual seat next to James she noticed Cierdesa and Sirius sitting by each other and a jealous Severus Snape looking at the two with distaste that was sitting in front of her.

"Has Severus ever dated anyone that you know of?" whispered Lily trying to keep it as low as possible so Cierdesa wouldn't hear her.

"I heard he dated someone once for a year, but something drastic happened and she dumped him breaking his greasy black heart," said a gleeful James grinning at the prospect of a broken-hearted Snape.

"That's interesting, what house was she from?"

Lily was now quite interested, but tried to hide it from James by raising just one of her eyebrows looking normal. He sent her a funny look wondering why she would want to know the information, but provided her with it anyway.

"That's the weirdest part about the relationship. Everyone knew that he was involved with someone because his personality changed and someone, as in Remus, found his diary on a raid in his dorm and it was filled with thoughts of love for his girlfriend, but it didn't mention any specific information about her. Probably just some bitch from Slytherin, no girl from any other house would want to go out with _Snape._"

"He's not _that_ bad, James, but thanks for the information. I was just wondering because he always seems so lonely."

"Yeah, well he deserves loneliness. When he grows up he'll probably be killing off all the muggles he can with a flick of his wand."

Lily kept silent for the rest of the class keeping notes of the next potion they were to make in the class tomorrow and making a note to ask Cierdesa if she knew why Severus would be looking at her like that. Picking up a piece of paper she wrote doodling on her own, _Hush now my baby, Kalika. I'll see you soon._

Yes, she would keep her.


End file.
